When the pastor frantically called me, the church leaders were already under fire from the congregation and the local media. A few years earlier, they had a promising young staff member working in the youth department. But when someone noticed he was spending way too much time with one particular minor girl in the youth department, leadership was notified, and the immediate investigation indicated that something was indeed wrong.
Getty Images via Unsplash+
The young man was fired, and because a minor was involved, the proper authorities were notified.
So far, all good decisions.
But two years later, the church hired that same young man back, this time to lead its sports outreach, and within a very short time, he was coaching the kids’ teams. Once parents learned about his past, they were rightly outraged, and it didn’t take long for that outrage to spread.
Now church leaders were calling me, asking for advice on how to handle the firestorm. My first question was:
“Why in the world did you rehire that young man?”
The pastor spoke up and said his family had been longtime members, and even after crossing such a serious line with his behavior, the pastor wanted to restore him to ministry.
But that attempt was coming at a cost – a serious cost for which the church might not recover.
Churches sometimes confuse forgiveness with keeping employees on staff. But when someone commits a serious breach of conduct, those are two very different decisions. And in my experience, the question comes up more often than you might think.
Just like in this case, a pastor or ministry employee commits serious misconduct. The organization responds appropriately. Time passes. The person apologizes, seeks restoration, and demonstrates repentance. Then somebody asks, “If we’ve forgiven him, shouldn’t we give him another chance?”
That question confuses spiritual restoration with organizational responsibility.
Over the years, I’ve seen pastors and ministry leaders struggle to fire employees who have crossed a serious moral, sexual, financial, or ethical line. I understand why. Ministry leaders are shepherds. They naturally default to forgiveness, redemption, and restoration, and the decision becomes far more difficult when we know and love the person who crossed that line.
But compassion can cloud judgment.
Restoration does not require returning someone to ministry leadership or even a lower-level staff position. When an employee crosses a serious line, leadership has a responsibility to protect the congregation, the organization, and its credibility. Friendship can make that decision painful, and family relationships within the church can make it agonizing.
But even when it’s painful, it’s really pretty simple. If a bank president embezzles money from the bank, he doesn’t get to be bank president anymore.
Compassion matters. Personal and family restoration matters. But neither requires returning someone to the position they lost, or even placing them in a similar role.
Handle a termination honestly and clearly. Establish the facts. Document what happened. Get appropriate legal, spiritual, and communications counsel. If a victim is involved, help them immediately. Avoid gossip and public humiliation. When appropriate, offer pastoral care and help create a path toward personal and family restoration. Forgive them and help everyone involved heal.
And then say, “You can’t work here anymore.”
That may be one of the hardest sentences a ministry leader ever has to say. But your responsibility extends beyond the employee sitting across the desk. As a leader, you’re responsible for the people you serve, the staff you work alongside, and the trust the ministry has been given.
Sometimes helping a former employee discover a completely different career, whether at a hardware store, a real estate office, or somewhere else outside ministry, may be one of the most compassionate things you can do.
MAIN PHOTO: Getty Images via Unsplash+
This article originally appeared at philcooke.com. For more recommendations on making hard choices during a crisis, check out Phil’s book, “Church on Trial: How to Protect Your Congregation, Mission, and Reputation During a Crisis.”